I have been contemplating this blog for over a week now. My grandfather, who I never remember being really sick in my life, was admitted to the hospital last week. He had some major muscle weakness and was not well at all. Come to find out it was a dangerous reaction of two drugs that he was prescribed. I guess the reaction raises your enzyme levels in your body and attacks the muscles. Needless to say it put him out.
But there has been a much bigger lesson here. One that I can hardly think about without getting upset. My grandmother is in the late stages of Alzheimer's and my grandfather has been exhausting himself to no end to try and keep her out of a nursing home. In the last 4 months it has become unbearable for him. He says he rests at night. But as an 86 year old man from "The Greatest Generation", being a caregiver was somewhat foreign to begin with.
As we age we never stop to think of how hard it could be one day to loose our independance. To rely on others, where we use to do it all ourselves. To be married to someone for almost 60 years and watch them loose who they are. Can anyone blame him for wanting to hold on to their life? For not wanting to let go?
A hurricane takes their home and most things in it. A disease takes the person who was suppose to be with you through 3 children, 11 grandchildren, 12 great grandchildren. Now. That same disease is taking you down with her.
I believe all this is the turning point. I believe that with faith, HE answers prayers. And I believe that we can worry. But when the time comes we need to get on our knees and thank HIM for stepping in. Well I am on my knees now. I mourned the loss of my Granny. I gave that to YOU. But damn it, I will not let the disease have my Granddaddy too...